How should you behave with kids? Important Tips for Behavioral Therapy for Kids
The biggest challenge parents face with a toddler is managing their behavior. Whether they’re refusing to put on their shoes or throwing heavy tantrums. It might be because they are facing some health and emotional problem. For parents, behavioral managing techniques can build a roadmap to make their child calmer and more consistent to manage problem plus develop the skills that are needed to regulate their behavior.
The best outcome of the therapy comes when therapy is given by the parents themselves. For that, parents have to learn skills and strategies to help their child. Behavior therapy, given by parents with the support of therapists or skill provider, teaches children to better control their own behavior, leading to improved functioning at school, home and in relationships. Learning and practicing behavior therapy requires a lot of time and effort, but it has long-lasting benefits for the child.
The motives of behavior therapy are to encourage positive behaviors and discourage unwanted or problem behaviors in children. Good treatment plans will include monitoring improvement closely and adjusting the therapy as required along the way.
What a parent should do?
1. To learn about the behavior problem of your children you should recall what happened before it and after it.
a) Triggers- What brings that behavior?
b) Behaviors – What kind of behavior child have?
c) Consequences- what happened after that?
2. The first step is to identify target behaviors. These can be expected, observable and measurable (so that everyone can agree on whether it happened or not)
3. Parents should know that their child won’t be aware of the behavior that is expected of them
4. Remember to tell your child all the important instructions face-to-face. Things shouted from a distance are less likely to be remembered and understood. And the same will be imitated by the child.
5. Alteration can be hard for kids, especially in the middle of something they are enjoying. Having a warning already gives children the chance to find a good ending place for an activity and makes the transition less painful.
6. Don’t just keep on imposing your thoughts on them to find a way to teach them that seems interesting or enjoyable to them.
How to embrace expected good behavior:
1. Take into consideration the environmental and emotional factors like hunger, fatigue, anxiety or distractions can all make it much more difficult for children to rule in their behavior.
2. When it’s time for something that your child doesn’t like for instance if it’s homework time remove distractions like video games and toys, provide snacks, establish an organized place for kids to study and ensure to schedule some breaks — attention isn’t infinite. This way you can manage his environment.
3. As kids grow up, it’s important they have an outlook in their own scheduling. Giving a structured choice — “Do you want to take a shower after dinner or before?” — can help them feel authorized and encourage them to become more self-sufficient.
What not to do?
1. Children value attention from the important adults in their life so much that any attention — positive or negative — is better than none. Negative attention, scolding or beating— actually increases bad behavior over time. Also, responding to behaviors with bad words or yelling adversely affects children’s self-esteem. So try to reduce the negative or bad attention.
2. The most effective consequences are immediate. Every moment that passes after a behavior, your child is less likely to link their behavior to the consequence. It becomes punishing to wait for an actual response, and it’s much less likely to actually change the behavior. Try to make your responses least delayed.
3. Parents get very frustrated/ enraged. At times, they may be so frustrated that they overreact. A huge consequence can be disheartening for children and they may give up even trying to behave better. So try not to get angry at them.
4. When a child show tantrums instead of putting on his shoes or picking up his blocks and, in frustration/ hurry, you do it for him, you’re increasing the chances that he will do this again next time. So pamper your child to a limit.
What to do?
1. Giving your child an optimistic boost for being good & humble help assurance of the evolving good behavior. Positive attention makes the quality of the relationship better, enhances self-confidence, and makes everyone who is involved feel good. Positive attention to brave behavior can also help attenuate anxiety, and help kids become more responsive to whatever told to them and help to parent better.
2. Keep in mind to ignore the only minor misbehaviors and that should also not happen too often — NOT anger or aggression and NOT very disrespectful behavior. Actively letting go misbehaviors involves the intentionally drawing of attention when a child starts to misbehave — as you ignore, but you wait for positive behavior to resume. You should give optimistic remarks as soon as good behavior starts. By keeping hold of your attention until you get desired behavior, this way you can teach your child what to do and how to behave to get good remarks and attention from you.
3. Giving rewards to the child time to time for good behaviour can encourage your child to be good and carry positive behavior. It has to be acknowledged to the child that the reward is something which is earned when you do hard work and here hard work refers to good behaviors. Rewards are most effective as motivators when the child can choose from a variety of options like extra time on the iPad, a special treat, etc. Rewards should be linked to specific behaviors and always delivered consistently. This reduces the possibility of bad behaviour as the child love rewards.
4. Time out for various things and activities is the best and hardest thing a guardian can do in order to maintain the behaviour.
5. Establish the rules and let everyone know about what leads to the time outs and what kind of behaviour can lead to time out and for how long.
6. Remember in order to get the best outcome from your child’s behavior, you must behave at best of yourself in order to set an example in front of your child. If you are frustrated and don’t have well on good behaviour then your child goes on the wrong path.
7. During a time out, there should be no talking, no interaction with the child until you are ending the time out. Time out should end only once the child has been calm and quiet briefly so they learn to associate the end of time out with this desired behavior.
We hope you get the best of your child behaviour following the above rules. All the best..!!
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